A Mindful Way to Grow New Habits

A Mindful Way to Grow New Habits: Planting Seeds on Tu B’Shvat 

Tu B’Shvat is the new year for trees, a Jewish holiday to acknowledge nature and the process of growth. It marks the start of a new fruit-bearing cycle for trees in Israel. Our own growth is similar to what happens in nature.

A whole garden isn’t created overnight, and neither are new habits.By focusing on the positive and noticing the tiny seeds that begin to peek out of the soil—the small moments of change—we start to recognize the progress we’re already making on our path toward the life we want to live.

A seed can’t stay a seed forever. When cared for with the right soil, sunlight, and water, it naturally begins to change form and grow into whatever it was meant to be. In much the same way, positive change in our lives asks us to let go of old patterns and trust the process of transformation. Growth doesn’t always happen quickly—but it does happen when the conditions are right.

Once a seed has transformed, we appreciate it for what it offers: a bright sunflower, a crisp carrot, a shady tree. Yet every one of these began as something small and unseen, nourished over time.

So too with us. Go out and begin planting seeds in your life, even when it feels difficult. With patience, care, and consistency, what now feels like an empty plot can gradually fill with meaning, resilience, and growth.

What does this look like in everyday life?

Imagine your intention is to reduce stress and become more present in your daily life. Like tending a garden, this might include:

• Setting a simple, realistic intention (for example, pausing for three conscious breaths a few times a day)

• Creating supportive conditions (turning off some notifications, building in short pauses, protecting a few minutes of quiet)

• Practicing gently but consistently, rather than perfectly

• Noticing small shifts—slightly more patience, one mindful cup of tea, a moment of real listening—and allowing these to count as real growth.

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There’s a quote from Zen pholosophy, “You can’t pull on the plants and expect them to grow faster.”We cannot force seeds to grow—and we cannot force ourselves to change on demand. All we can do is create supportive conditions, plant the right seeds, and tend to them with care. Then we practice trusting the process.

Gardeners also know that much is beyond their control: too little rain, too much rain, harsh weather, pests. In life too, obstacles and setbacks are inevitable. The invitation is not to give up, but to stay flexible, adjust if we need to, and keep returning to what matters.

Thich Nhat Hanh expressed this beautifully when he wrote: When lettuce doesn’t grow well, we don’t blame the lettuce—we look at the conditions: the water, the soil, the light. Yet with people, we so quickly turn to blame. With understanding instead of blame, with care instead of force, relationships—and inner landscapes—can begin to change.

A Short Guided Mindfulness Practice For Planting Our Own Seeds

TO LISTEN TO THIS ON INSIGHT TIMER: https://insig.ht/mXtBmfjn8Zb

Let’s try this guided practice to set an intention for a habit you would like to begin or strengthen.

Take a moment to sit comfortably and allow your eyes to close, or soften your gaze.Bring your attention to the feeling of the body sitting here… the contact with the chair… the ground beneath you.

Now notice the natural rhythm of your breath, just as it is. No need to change anything.

Imagine that with each in-breath, you are gently planting a seed of intention in the soil of your awareness.It might be a seed of calm… of patience… of presence… of kindness… or perhaps of responding rather than reacting.You don’t need to choose the “perfect” intention—simply notice what feels meaningful for you right now. (pause)Allow that seed to be planted softly, without effort, without pressure. (pause)

With each out-breath, allow the body to soften just a little… the shoulders releasing… the jaw unclenching… the belly softening.

You don’t need to force the seed to grow. Your role is simply to plant it, and to return again and again with care and attention—just as you would tend a garden.

When you’re ready, gently open your eyes, carrying this intention with you into the rest of your day.

Happy Tu B'Shvat!

TO LISTEN TO THIS PRACTICE ON THE INSIGHT TIMER APP:

https://insig.ht/dXAXboGo8Zb

OR

https://insighttimer.com/skeinon/guided-meditations/mindfully-growing-new-habits-planting-tu-b-shvat

Mindfulness & Self-Care: What We Can Learn from Yitro

Mindfulness & Self-Care: What We Can Learn from Yitro

In this week’s parsha, Yitro, Moshe’s father-in-law visits and notices that Moshe is working tirelessly—listening to the people’s problems, answering their questions, and offering guidance from morning until night. Concerned for Moshe’s well-being, Yitro warns him that taking on so much alone will only wear him out. He advises Moshe to delegate responsibilities to the elders, allowing them to assist with the people's concerns.

How many of us struggle to ask for help or delegate tasks when we feel overwhelmed? Do we even recognize when we are overwhelmed?

One of the most valuable lessons we can take from this story is the importance of self-care—not just as an occasional luxury, but as an essential practice for taking care of ourselves.

Mindfulness and Self-Care

Self-care is an integral part of mindfulness. Practicing mindfulness helps us become more aware of what we are feeling and thinking at any given moment. With that awareness, we can choose how to respond—whether to take a short break, continue what we’re doing, or shift our focus to something else.

Creating a self-care plan allows us to identify our needs, both in everyday life and during particularly stressful or challenging times. It helps us balance our emotional and physical well-being and make intentional choices about how to care for ourselves.

How to Create a Self-Care Plan

According to Shelly Tygielski, founder of America Meditates, we can create a self-care plan by following these steps:

1️⃣ List the key areas of your life—work, family, friendships, health, fitness, spirituality, or any other priorities.

2️⃣ Set personal goals—for example, spending more time with friends, incorporating mindfulness into your routine, or making time for physical activity.

3️⃣ Identify potential obstacles—what might get in the way of following through on your plan? Acknowledge these challenges so you can prepare for them.

4️⃣ Seek support—share your plan with a trusted friend who can offer encouragement and accountability.

5️⃣ Practice regularly—just as an athlete trains for an event, we need to commit to self-care as an ongoing practice rather than a one-time effort.

The best way to start or maintain a mindfulness practice is to join a course or group and practice together, as well as receiving guidance from a teacher.

Most importantly, be kind to yourself—change takes time, and self-care is a journey, not a destination.

If Moshe Rabenu could accept help and practice self-care, so can we.

I would love to help you in your journey of self-care and wellness.

Join me in my next mindfulness course in Jerusalem.

https://www.mindfulnesswithsusie.com/about-the-mindfulness-course-with-susie

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Cultivating Self-Awareness and Empathy: Parshat Vayeshev

Cultivating Self-Awareness and Empathy: How Joseph Becomes Mindful

In Parashat Vayeshev, Yosef is introduced as a נער, a term often interpreted to reflect his immaturity and self-centeredness. He brings negative reports about his brothers to their father, flaunts his dreams of dominance, and seems oblivious to how his actions affect those around him.  Yosef’s journey also includes betrayal and hardship, and it brings profound growth.  After being sold into slavery and later imprisoned, Yosef becomes more attuned to others’ emotions and needs. He becomes a valued and trusted employee of Potiphar, understanding what he needs.

This transformation continues in his interactions with the butler, and the baker in prison. Yosef listens deeply, discerns their concerns and understands who they are and what they need, and he offers interpretations of their dreams, showing empathy and insight. 

What brings about Yosef’s change and growth? Could it be surviving the traumatic experience of being thrown into a pit and sold into slavery by his brothers? Or thoughts of not wanting to disappoint his father Yaakov? 

Was Yosef mindful? His growth mirrors the process of mindfulness—a practice of cultivating awareness of oneself and others. Initially, Yosef’s focus is inward, but as he faces life’s challenges, he learns to balance self-awareness with an acute sensitivity to those around him. Mindfulness teaches us that being present and attentive can transform not only ourselves but also our relationships. Yosef’s ability to truly see and respond to others allows him to bring healing to his relationships and solutions to a national crisis of drought and potential famine, ultimately rising to a position of leadership and saving a nation from starvation.

His story reminds us that being aware and sensitive to others and stepping outside of ourselves, can profoundly impact our lives and the lives of those around us. 

Let’s try a meditation that cultivates self-reflection, empathy, and awareness of one's impact on others:

• Find a quiet and comfortable place to sit or lie down.

• Close your eyes or keep them lightly closed, focusing your gaze downward.

  
  

• Start by tuning into your body, noticing the weight of your body on the surface you are resting on and any points of contact.

  
  

• Focus on your breath, observing the sensations of breathing, without controlling the breath in any way. Noticing as you breathe in…. And noticing as you breathe out…. (take a few breaths)

  
  

•  Ask yourself, “how am I feeling right now?” Notice any emotions, thoughts, or physical sensations without judging them.  These feelings and sensations come and go.  Try to notice them without holding on to them. You can try to label them as “thought” or "thinking", "sensation" or "feeling” as they come up, and then watch them pass. (short pause)

  
  

• "Now, bring to mind a recent interaction with someone where you felt a strong emotion or reaction. It could be a positive or negative experience. Imagine as many details as you can about the situation.  Reflect on how your actions and words may have impacted the other person. Consider how you would like to be treated in a similar situation. (short pause)

• "Try asking yourself: 'How can I act with more kindness and compassion in my interactions with others?' 'What can I learn from this experience to grow and improve?'  And also very important, how do I treat myself?  Let these questions sit for a while, and feel free to come back to them to help you understand yourself more, and your behavior impacts on others.

  
  

• As you exhale, repeat to yourself: '” May my actions bring kindness and compassion to me and those around me.” Repeat it.

• "Take a few deep breaths and slowly open your eyes. Notice how you feel in this moment. Carry this sense of self-awareness, empathy, and compassion into your daily life.  Your self-awareness can lead to greater compassion and understanding towards others.    

  
  

Remember that every interaction is an opportunity for growth and connection.

To listen to this podcast and guided practice:

https://insighttimer.com/skeinon/guided-meditations/cultivating-self-awareness-empathy-parshat-vayeshev

To learn more about mindfulness courses and workshops In English : https://www.mindfulnesswithsusie.com/about-the-mindfulness-course-with-susie

 In Hebrew: https://www.mindfulnesswithsusie.com/he/mindfulness-course-with-susie-lp

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