How To Embrace Hope Amidst Sadness

The 9 Days Before Tisha B'Av and How to Embrace Both Sadness and Happiness

How To Embrace Hope Amidst Sadness

In the first nine days of the month of Av, leading up to Tisha B’Av, it is customary to intensify our observance of mourning rituals to commemorate the destruction of the Temple. This period is considered the saddest time of the Jewish calendar and all activities that bring joy are reduced. The book of Lamentations, which we read on Tisha B’Av, ends on an optimistic note that the sages added: “Restore Us, Let us return and Renew our days as of old” Even in the darkest of times, there is hope and room for optimism. Most of us would prefer to be happy rather than sad. Happiness is both a genetic trait and something we can cultivate in our outlook. That’s the good news. But we can’t avoid sadness, as much as we may try to avoid it or run away from it. Both happiness and sadness are part of living and the range of emotions that we feel. If we try to push sadness away and not feel it, we might not feel happiness to its fullest. Just as we know it's light because darkness exists, experiencing sadness allows us to better understand and experience joy. In mindfulness practice, when we notice difficult sensations or feelings, we can visualize them as passing waves or clouds. They come and go, impermanent by nature. We just need to notice and practice focusing on and observing our experiences in the present moment. If we practice long enough, we will recognize that life is dynamic and that while sadness may come and linger for a while, happiness may be just around the corner, waiting for us to let it in.

Shabbat Shalom

THE NEXT MBSR COURSE IS STARTING ON 5/9/23 IN JERUSALEM. THERE ARE STILL A COUPLE SPOTS LEFT!!

https://www.mindfulnesswithsusie.com/courses/about-the-course Vid Ad MA and Jer HEB.mp4

How Mindfulness Can Help Us Overcome Our Fears: Parshat Shelach

This week's Torah portion Shelach recounts the story of the spies sent by Moshe to scout the Land of Cana'an before Am Yisrael enter the land. The tale takes a tragic turn as the majority of the spies return with a negative report, instilling fear and doubt in the hearts of the people.

The spies were chosen from each of the twelve tribes and tasked with assessing the land's inhabitants, resources, and fortifications. While they returned with physical evidence of the land's abundance, they also brought back a distorted narrative.

Ten of the spies exaggerated the difficulties they encountered, painting a bleak picture of the land and its inhabitants. Their fear-driven report convinced the Israelites that they would be unable to conquer the land, leading to widespread despair and rebellion against G-d's promise.

This episode highlights the power of our own perceptions and how our fears and insecurities can color our understanding of reality. The spies' report was not objective and might have been influenced by their own doubts and self-limiting beliefs.

When our own fears and insecurities cloud our judgment, we can try to approach situations with openness and awareness of our emotional baggage.

Mindfulness can help us overcome these challenges and fears and help us cultivate resilience. By staying present in each moment, we can make conscious choices rather than being swayed by our insecurities or internal struggles.

Mindfulness invites us to be present with our fears- with compassion and curiosity-rather than running away from them.

Our brains are wired to focus on fear as a method of ensuring our survival.

For cavemen, this was very useful to protect them from danger, such as life threatening animals. We, on the other hand, are not threatened by literal death on a daily basis.

Fear takes us out of our bodies and limits our reactions. It can stop us from participating more fully in life. When fear comes -- breathe and let go; when fear knocks at the door -- invite it in to share a cup of tea as the poet Rumi would say in his poem The Guest House (full poem below).

Today, we will explore being with and accepting uncomfortable feelings or sensations such as fear or body discomfort.

Let's try this short practice:

Find a comfortable seated position, allowing your body to relax. Gently close your eyes and bring your attention to your breath. Take a few deep breaths, breathing in deeply through your nose, and exhaling fully through your mouth. Where do you feel your breath most? In your nostrils? In your chest? In your stomach? Let your attention rest in the place in your body that you feel the breath the most. (pause)

Now, shift your focus to your body. Tune in to any sensations of discomfort such as tension, heaviness, tingling, heat or unease that you may be experiencing. Notice where in your body you feel these sensations. Allow yourself to acknowledge them without judgment or resistance. If you aren't aware of any sensations, then notice that. (pause)

As you continue to breathe, imagine sending your breath to the areas in your body where you're experiencing discomfort. With each inhale, visualize your breath as a soothing, healing energy that surrounds and embraces these sensations. As you exhale, imagine releasing any tension or resistance, allowing yourself to fully accept whatever you are experiencing right now. (pause)

Now, bring your attention to your thoughts and emotions. Notice any fears, worries about the future or regrets about the past, or any negative thoughts that may be arising. Instead of pushing them away or getting caught up in them, practice observing them from a place of non-judgmental awareness, so noticing, but not judging, “this is good or bad.” (pause)

As you continue to observe your thoughts and emotions, remind yourself that they are temporary and ever-changing. They do not define you. Embrace a sense of openness and curiosity, exploring these uncomfortable sensations with compassion and acceptance. (pause)

Now, shift your attention back to your breath. Use your breath as an anchor to stay present in the moment. With each inhale, breathe in a sense of acceptance and compassion. With each exhale, let go of any resistance or discomfort, allowing yourself to be fully present with what arises. (pause)

As we near the end of this practice, take a moment to appreciate your ability to face and be present with uncomfortable feelings and sensations. Acknowledge the strength and courage it takes to meet these experiences with mindfulness and compassion.

When you're ready, slowly open your eyes and bring your attention back to the space you're in.

Carry this sense of mindfulness and acceptance with you as you navigate through your day, remembering that you have the ability to meet discomfort with presence and compassion.

The story of the spies serves as a lesson for us, urging us to examine our own tendencies to misinterpret events due to our fears and insecurities, something that can impact all our relationships and well being . By cultivating self-awareness, compassion, and resilience, we can navigate through challenging situations with clarity, and react in more healthy ways.

May you find peace and strength in embracing all aspects of your experience.

TO LISTEN TO THIS ON SPOTIFY:

https://open.spotify.com/episode/3rACxGE3tGLhxRdTXdmS3U?si=d6Nyt539R8SdClaXeThAKg

The Guest House , Jalaluddin Rumi (translation by Coleman Barks)

This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival. A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes As an unexpected visitor. Welcome and entertain them all! Even if they're a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture, still treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight. The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in. Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.

Mindfulness and Second Chances

What We Can Learn From Pesach Sheni: Mindfulness and Second Chances

In this week's Torah portion Behaalotecha, we encounter a unique event known as Pesach Sheni, or the "Second Passover."

According to the Book of Numbers (9:1-14), the Israelites were instructed to observe the Passover festival on the fourteenth day of the first month of Nisan. However, some people found themselves ritually impure and unable to participate in the Pesach Offerings. And yet they didn’t want to miss out, so they approached Moshe, seeking guidance and a chance to partake in the Pesach offering.

In their genuine yearning for connection and desire to make up for missing out, they petition Moshe, who then turns to G-d for an answer. The divine response was surprising: a second chance was granted. A new date was established, exactly one month later, on which these individuals could bring their Passover offerings and fully partake in the ritual offerings.

Pesach Sheni teaches us that redemption and growth are not limited to a single moment, but rather an ongoing journey. Sometimes we just need to be open to new possibilities.

This significant event carries profound implications for our daily lives. It serves as a reminder that we are not defined by our failures or missed opportunities but rather by our capacity to learn, grow, and seize new chances that come our way.

The people who missed the Pesach Offering were not passive. They didn’t throw up their hands and say , “Too bad, we missed out.” Instead they beseeched Moshe and asked most assertively “why should we be kept back just because we were accidentally made impure?” (Numbers 9:7 ) "ואמרו האנשים ההמה אליו , אנחנו טמאים לנפש אדם ; למה נגרע לבלתי הקריב את קרבן השם במועד בתוך במעד בתוך בני ישראל?” Mindfulness practice can help us to seize or make the most out of missed opportunities. By learning to cultivate our awareness of what we are experiencing through paying attention to our feelings, physical sensation and thoughts --with acceptance and kindness to ourselves-- we can acknowledge what we are feeling, and also not dwell on or ruminate on what could have been. We can allow ourselves to be present in the here and now, and notice and be open to possibilities around us. In our fast-paced and often chaotic lives, we may find ourselves consumed by regrets, dwelling on missed opportunities, or feeling trapped by past mistakes. However, Pesach Sheni reminds us that every day offers a new opportunity for growth and transformation. By practicing mindfulness, we develop the capacity to see beyond our perceived limitations and embrace the endless possibilities that exist in the present.

Try this short practice: Find a comfortable place to sit where you won’t be disturbed. Bring your attention to your breath. Notice the sensation of the breath entering and leaving your body. Feel the gentle rise and fall of your chest or the subtle movement of your abdomen. Allow your breath to anchor you to the present moment, grounding you in the here and now. (pause) As you continue to breathe, acknowledge any thoughts or emotions that arise. So if feelings of sadness, disappointment, or uncertainty arise as a result of any setback, difficulty or impasse you are experiencing, observe them without judgment. Recognize that it is natural to feel this way, and allow these emotions to be present without resistance. (pause) Notice any sensations in your body as you imagine the possibilities that lie ahead. Are there any areas of tension or tightness? Breathe into those areas, allowing them to soften and release. Allow yourself to be open and receptive to whatever you’re feeling in this moment.

And now remind yourself of your own resilience and inner strength. Recognize that you have overcome challenges before and have the capacity to do so again. Trust in your ability to navigate this new path and create a life that aligns with your values and aspirations. (pause) As you continue to breathe, bring your attention to the present moment. Let go of any thoughts or worries about the past or future. Instead, focus on the opportunities that exist right here, right now. What small steps can you take today to move forward and rebuild your life?

Our past limitations or circumstances needn’t define our future. What if we tried to look beyond our perceived constraints and embrace possibilities that exist now? How would you like to move on from a disappointment or misfortune in your life? Just as those who were ritually impure and unable to participate in the initial Passover offering were granted a second chance, we too can overcome obstacles and seize opportunities for personal and spiritual development. Pesach Sheni serves as a powerful reminder that second chances and taking a new path are inherent in our daily lives. Mindfulness can help us to be fully present and learn from our past experiences, recognize these openings, and create a future filled with growth and possibility.